The Final Countdown


Eleven days to go!

All of the details are starting to fall into place and it’s actually looking like we’re going to pull this wedding off. We’ve done so much work and there is still some to do. Clean the house, meet with the caterer, get the stuff to the venue…my gosh, it’s like running a marathon. Just when you think your cool for the home stretch, you come up against “the wall” gasping for breath with stabbing pains in your ribs. Well, it’s not quite that dramatic but you get the picture.

I’ve run into a little bit of a hurdle in our home stretch. Traditionally in a Jewish wedding vows are not said like in the movies when the blushing bride and groom look into each others’ eyes and proclaim their love before saying “I do”. The ketuba pretty much serves as the vows. Alx and I decided to go with reading the ketubah out loud before signing it to serve as us saying our vows. We wrote it together and it’s beautiful; however, we felt that something needed to be said when we exchange our rings. Maybe I’ve watched too many romantic comedies but whatever the reason I just couldn’t exchange the rings without saying something.

Herein lies the hurdle. What the hell am I supposed to say? Don’t get me wrong, I love the guy with all of my heart but how do you express that in a few sentences without sounding like it came straight from a cheesy romance novel? On top of that, there’s no “do you take this man/woman” stuff to fluff-out any literary shortcomings that my proclamation might have.

The real kicker is that I always bounce my writing off of Alx before putting it out into the great wide open but we decided it would be sweet to not know what each other is going to say. Damn, I didn’t think that one through.

So, I figured I’d hit-up the next best thing and ask you all what you think. Did you say something to your significant other? Is there something someone has said to you that you’d like to share?

In other words, HELP! My wedding is in eleven days and I’m supposed to say something earth shattering to the man I love and frankly, my mind is so bogged down with random details about everything else in life right now that I just can’t get it out. Your insight will be much appreciated. I look forward to being inspired.

2 thoughts on “The Final Countdown”

  • Haha. I can tell how excited you are for your wedding day. Having a countdown really makes me nervous.

  • Many couples confuse the vows with the words said during the ring exchange, or just assume that the rings are exchanged while the vows are said. There is a slight difference. During the vows you make promises to each other about your life together as a married couple. During the ring exchange, you explain to each other what the ring is meant to symbolize, or what you hope your significant other will remember whenever he or she looks at the ring. Although it is traditional that the bride and groom say the same words during the ring exchange, I always encourage them to make it more personal and say something different to each other.

    Some possible words to be said during the ring exchange are:

    1. I give you this ring, in token and pledge of my constant faith and abiding love for you.

    2. I give you this ring as a symbol of how endlessly happy you make me and of how crazy I am about you. I give you this ring, so you will always know how much I love you. May it belong to your hand as my heart belongs to you.

    3. With this ring, I pledge my love and faithfulness to you, today, tomorrow and always.

    4. I give you this ring as a symbol of my vows to you. May it encircle your finger always as my love does your heart.

    5. As a sign of my love and my knowledge that in marrying you, I am becoming much more than I am, I give you this ring with the promise that I will love you and keep my heart open to you all the days of my life.

    6. I give you this ring as a symbol of my promise to always love you, cherish you, honor you, and respect you.

    7. (Traditional Jewish Ring Exchange): Behold, thou art consecrated unto me with this ring according to the law of Moses and of Israel. (In Hebrew, you would say, “Harey at mekuddeshet li b’taba’at zo k’dat Moshe v’Israel.”)

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